12 September 2012
It's OK, Jets fans. SMILE! This might actually be fun.
I'm trying to be realistic this season. No, not with my post-Week One expectations (SUPER BOWL!!!!!), but rather with how much I'm going to write this season. Last year I thought I could keep up my college era production. Instead, the harsh reality of being a real person quickly drained me of my creative energy. This year, I'm giving myself more reasonable expectations. I'm hoping for two posts a week---one a Q and A with the opposing team's blogger---and the other a non-game recap (I work Sundays) or a patented situational comedy involving one of the players (a Tebow "Beautiful Mind" series would probably offend too many people; Bart Scott is in the lead at the moment).
This week, in honor of Sunday's shocking, disorienting and probably wildly misleading offensive outburst, here are 34 Thoughts on the 2012 New York Jets (we're not counting special teams and defensive scores).
1. What are the chances Woody Johnson was disappointed with the Week One result? Not only did the Jets win, but Sanchez played well! And to top it off, Tebow was booed! Careful Jets fans, we're in a media business, don't forget. Woody could cut Sanchez at any moment. THAT would sell newspapers!
2. The Jets still have no running game, mainly because Shonn Greene is not an elite running back. There's a reason he was a third round pick.
3. I grow increasingly more uncomfortable with Skinny Rex every week.
4. The Jets punter only had two attempts last week, but both were absolute beauties, including a 55-yarder that landed inside the Bills five-yard line. I'll learn his name next week.
5. I greatly regret committing to 34 thoughts.
6. The Steelers are very beatable. On a neutral site or at home I'd guarantee a win, but in Pittsburgh it's hard not to call the Steelers the favorite.
7. I still have not regained feeling in one of my toes from the 2010 AFC Championship Game.
8. Stephen Hill will undoubtedly cost the Jets a game with a big drop, but he showed the potential to be an elite receiver against the Bills.
9. Need a cold shower? (I'm convinced Cimini openly roots against the Jets in the press box. Can anyone confirm or deny this?)
10. Bart Scott was the worst Jet on the field Sunday, so his postgame comments only made him look like more of an ass. He truly is a clown.
11. Jeff Cumberland actually looked like a reliable tight end on Sunday. This can't make Dustin Keller happy in a contract season.
12. Muhammad Wilkerson will be the second best player on the Jets defense by the end of the season.
13. How many times have the Jets waived Patrick Turner in the past three seasons? At least four? His enduring legacy will be breaking Jim Leonhard's leg in practice (and probably costing the Jets a Super Bowl).
14. It's so annoying playing in the same division as the Patriots.
15. The Jets will need 'Tone Time to win on Sunday.
16. While Sanchez did play splendidly versus the Bills, his inability to get a play off after spiking the ball during the two-minute drill before halftime was very disconcerting.
17. I still think Jeremy Kerley is a showboat and will cost the Jets a game by muffing a punt.
18. The Rams are starting Robert Turner at center and Wayne Hunter at right tackle on Sunday versus the Redskins. SCHOTTY! (I give any Rams blogger permission to continue The Beautiful Mind series.)
19. It may sound righteous, but Cro high-stepping it into the end zone from the 10-yard line on kind of spoiled the whole play for me.
20. Ryan Fitzpatrick's contract! (That's the joke....and the punchline.)
21. Watching Darrelle Revis play football brings me great joy.
22. I caught my 58-year old father nodding his head to Flo Rida's "Low" after the Jets took a 41-7 lead early in the third quarter. Sports is a powerful thing.
23. If the Jets can split their next four games (PIT, MIA, SF, HOU), I will feel mighty good heading into the Colts game at home in Week 6.
24. I genuinely wonder what Tim Tebow must have thought when he was booed by the home crowd. He has to regret not selecting Jacksonville as his trade destination, right?
25. If Sanchez continues playing this well and the Jets win the Super Bowl, Eva Longoria deserves a place in the Kate Hudson Hall of Fame.
26. Is there anything more annoying than the siren they randomly play at home games? Don't they know people associate sirens with panic and fear? Especially two days before the anniversary of 9/11?
27. I've never been more unsure of what to make of a player than with Austin Howard. You don't shut down Mario Williams by accident, but you also don't become an undrafted free agent by accident. I could see him going either way, more likely towards sucking, of course.
28. John Conner is so overrated.
29. LaRon Landry is an assassin. And his pit bull's name is Trauma. I may or may not buy his jersey by Week 4. (The dog's, not Landry's.)
30. Jets fans are insatiable. Even at 41-7, a fan in my section burst into profanity after C.J. Spiller broke off a big run. You would have thought the defense had just allowed the winning touchdown.
31. I could definitely see the Jets and Steelers fighting for a wild card spot come December. Don't underestimate the importance of Sunday determining the head-to-head tiebreaker.
32. Despite all the optimism, can't you envision seeing a stat after Week 5 that reads, "The Jets scored more points in Week One than they have the past four weeks combined?" Unlikely, but you did give it some thought.
33. Over/Under 33 times Roethlisberger avoids a sack to throw a completion or scramble for a gain on Sunday?
34. At least we can't go 0-16!
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